Journal

Yay for 2009! I can't believe it's already a new year, it feels like just yesterday I was celebrating 2008; and I just got used to writing '08 after the date of things.
I'm not sure about you, but '08 was a pretty good year for me. I graduated, I started college, I met loads of new people. My relationship grew stronger, my heart has grown larger. There are more additions to my family (animals of course) and life is continuing on.
What is your favorite memory from 2008? What new things did you get to experience? Was it a good/bad year for you?

I thought about a new years resolution .. but I just don't see one actually pulling through.
But here are some thoughts on resolutions made by stars:

"Shop til I drop to boost the economy" - Christian Siriano

"Try to top 2008, which I have no idea ho I'm going to do. I would love to win a Grammy!" - Jordin Sparks

"People can make New Year's resolutions, but I'm telling you all now, 'You're all lying because you're not going to stick to them for a year.'" - Lindsay Lohan

thanks to life&style weekly

Okay, and because of the new year! I added a new layout, and I am in love with it. Basically, it features Lindsay Lohan because I was listening to Bossy as I was designing it. Also, I deleted all my old icons and have started off fresh. Previews:


I'm trying to stay away from most celebrity based icons, and I have a lot of dog/cat icons. Childish? Kind of .. but they're adorable! I also edited my stock photos. I'm trying to re-organize psds, layouts, scans, and make new banners. Any suggestions?

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Merry Christmas to everyone, sorry I'm a bit late. I've been on christmas break for a bit and I just haven't found the time to do any updates. Whoops. There are just too many responsibilities for me right now.
I hope everyone got what they wanted for Santa ;)

But, here's something I need to get off my chest. A note straight from my facebook.
*Okay, lets be honest here. I go to college at UNI, yet it doesn't feel like I'm really in college. I don't feel like I have matured a ton or enhanced my education. I feel like the same old nicole, goofy and loving everyone. I'm not saying that the change was supposed to occur right away, I just expected some kind of indication inside that reminded me I was in college. But, instead, every time a family member or a friend asks me, "How is college going?" I stand there with a dumbfound look as if they have highly mistaken my identity. I have to reorganize my thoughts, I stutter a word, "Good." Then I realize I am, in fact, in college and not still a student at high school.

It only bothers me for one reason, I'm half way done with my first year of college. Once summer rolls around I won't be a freshman anymore. That gives me less time to adjust to calling myself a college student.

Maybe it's caused by all the fun my friends and I have. The kids I hang out with are the best around; I have no idea where I'd be without them. Okay, I do .. friendless (per say, since I do have some amazing friends elsewhere; yes YOU!). I could list them all off and say a few words about each, but they know who they are. They are well aware of their greatness and what they all do for me as a friend. I need not remind them. One thing though, when the cold weather is gone ... we are going DANCING! And I mean, all of us =]
College is just my home away from home. And that's all it feels like, 'the place' where I met the rest of my family. I cannot wait to get back from break to see them, they pretty much mean the world to me.


*Lets be honest. Even though I have great friends, everyone has their drama queens. I can think of three people with that at mind. No offense to these girls, but I just don't understand them. Constantly having to know where everyone is or who they're with, and other stalker traits, just aren't my thing. Plus, the girls who don't understand true friendship, that think it's cool to talk about everyone behind they're back while you're calling them "bff". I guess maybe I'm behind, but I thought real friends stand up for others and didn't put them down. Oh, and lets not forget the girls who like to blame others for their losses just because they can't stand the ones they blame. Get some proof before you make your accusations, it's appreciated.
I don't know why this stuff still bothers me! Majority of it happened a month ago, yet it's burned into my brain. I suppose there's always two sides to a story and I need to hear the other side for this to die down. We know that will never happen.


*Last one, I swear. You've probably had enough of me rambling on. Well, lets be honest. I have hurt a lot of people in the past. I wouldn't doubt if I was classified as a 'drama queen' in someone else' life. Let us get one thing straight though, I have never meant to hurt anyone. It has become obvious that I like attention, individual attention. I only can handle one persons' attention at a time, I don't like being in front of crowds giving a speech or making a scene. Yet, that one moment during the day when I'm hanging out with you I really appreciate having your full attention. The thing is, I'm giving you my full attention and that only lasts so long (I am known to have a short attention-span for some reason? I disagree though).
Getting to the point. That's how I hurt people, they feel the attention cast upon them. Until someone else strolls along and it's taken away. Add in my 'super friendly' traits and you've got a catastrophe waiting to happen. Once done, all eyes stare down at me, making me the bad guy (well, girl). And, for those of you who have experienced pain and hate to/from me, I'm sorry. I could apologize a million times and it wouldn't make up for what I have done. It kills me to know that I hurt you, and it kills me that I can't speak these words to you. I am a coward of my own mistakes. But, your forgiveness would mean the world to me. Better yet, your friendship.

Kay, that's all for now. PEACE

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